Can you harvest benefits from suffering? In this post, I want to share something that I find very important and that I think you might find very beneficial. It is kind of my philosophy, what I want to talk about has to do with pain, suffering, and agony. This sound like bad things and they feel bad when you go through them but… you actually need these things in order to grow and to accomplish anything worth accomplishing, so you shouldn´t be afraid of experiencing it.
It is something that will make you capable of accomplishing anything you want, whether it is financial goals, fitness goals, family goals, or anything in this life.
Most of YOU are SOFT
That is just a fact, I see it every day… Most of you want it to be easy all the time, you are soft.
Many people ask me how to get in shape, how to get a 6-pack for example.
So I ask them, do you have a training log? Do you write down everything you eat, how much water you drink, what exercises do you do an so on? What program do you follow? What diet?
Many ask me how to make money online, how to start an online business?
So I ask them, do you study for a few hours every day? Do you take action on what you learn every day? Are you consistent?
And I (almost) always get the same response “Ooh that is too much” that is “hard” or “ooh I don’t have time for that” and so on… (Complaining and excuses is all I hear)
That is because you are soft… I have to be honest with you here… You are soft.
Most want it to be easy, they don´t want to go through pain and suffering… They only want it instantly and in an easy way…
You have to understand that to accomplish something great, something that s worth having… then you have to go through stuff that is hard.
When I tell people that I don´t eat sugar, cookies and cakes… “Oooh I cannot do that, I have to live life”
…or when I tell people I work out 6 days per week… “oooh I cannot do that I don´t have time”
Shut the f##k up man! You ain´t the first one who have school, a job, or a family that works out for an hour per day…
- Don´t blame your family for your weakness
- Don´t blame your job for your weakness
- Don´t blame your school for your weakness
It’s YOU… If you were tough enough you could spare an hour or two every day… probably even a lot more.
People have time to watch TV for an hour per day, people know everything about last nights football/soccer game, people are experts at candy fucking crush…
Personally, I don´t even remember the last movie I saw, I NEVER watch TV and I have no idea of how Candy fucking crush or Clash of the bullshit clans even work…
I got goals… I ain´t got time for that shit… I got goals that are more important.
How I really started my online business
When I started out learning how to create an online business, and also created one was actually back when I had a 9-5… And it was not an “easy job” it was a hard job, on a sawmill.
Every day after work, I went straight to the gym… then straight home and worked on my online biz for a few hours before I went to bed…
Let me tell you a (my) story
I don´t like to speak about it too much because I get a little emotional… But anyway.
A few years ago m father got cancer, then he got chemotherapy treatment… The day after (his first treatment) I was at work, cutting some trees… I got a phone call from my mother, and she said: “John, your father is about to die. You have to come with me to the hospital”
She went on and told me that she had got a call from the hospital and they had told her that “she better come”
That was all they had said to her, but my mother had “read between the lines” and she understood that the time had come for my father…
When we arrived and went into the room where my father was… We got a HORRIBLE shock… He didn´t even look like he did the day before… He looked dead… He couldn´t move and he couldn´t speak…
Nobody warned us about this… They just let us go inside the room and see this for ourselves… Both me, and my mother started to cry, of course… I got very angry at the hospital staff and I screamed very bad things to them and told them to leave the room immediately… They did…
We (me and my mother) stayed with my dad for 8 hours like this… We spoke to him but he couldn´t speak back… We stayed until he died… (P.S. the moment after he died he actually looked like himself again and became beautiful again) Then we stayed another hour or so after also… until he got cold…
This was a big turning point in my life for me… I became a man this day… I had to be “the man of the family” as I lived with my mother at this time… Not financially (my father left money), but emotionally… I had to be the mentally strong one, and I made it my mission to smile (even though I was very sad).
I also started to work harder on my online biz, I worked harder in the gym… and I continued to work my 9-5…
I STILL did what was required to accomplish my goals…
I could just have made excuses, right? I mean that would have been a pretty good reason for making excuses, right?
Like: “Oooh my father was poisoned by so-called doctors giving him chemotherapy (even though he had diabetes and a very bad liver)
He was my best friend… He was always there for me… Now he is gone… So I just give up on my goals…
That would have been a good excuse, to stop working out, to being sad, unhappy and negative to people around me, to stop working on my online business (that wasn´t generating any money at all at the time)
NOBODY gives a f##k about my excuses!
And nobody cares about yours.
You cannot go to a hot girl that you want and tell her “Hey baby, I know I ain´t got the body you are attracted to, but you have to understand I got school, or work… So please date me anyway”
She doesn´t give a fuck!
She only cares about results
You cannot go into the Tesla store and say “Hey, I don´t have the money to buy this car, but you should just give it to me anyway because I had a bad uprising, and/or I don´t have time to create myself higher income”
They don´t care!
They only care about the results (you having the money required)
Life does NOT work like that
You have to be willing to do what´s required to achieve your goals… and most of the times… what is required is PAIN… SUFFERING… You have to go through a lot of pain.
You know… my father died so fast… One day he was functional, happy, able to speak, able to move… the next day he was paralyzed and not even able to speak… a few hours later his body was dead and cold…
That was VERY painful… right?
My mother was crying, my sister, my uncles, my cousins, everyone…
But that was actually something that made me a man.
The pain made me stronger.
To be honest… It was a sad thing BUT… what came out of it… the outcome was that I became a man. I felt it so strongly.
I promised him (my dad) that I would become stronger, I also promised myself, and I promised god.
I WILL reach my goals NO MATTER WHAT.
My point is:
After that, I knew what I was capable to take… I also knew that I was able to take more… So now, when I get a challenge in life, I just feel that I have been through much worse in life.
However… I see it every day… people avoiding pain… PLEASE do NOT do that.
Instead, be GOOD at dealing with pain. Go out in the cold weather, go out in the rain…
- I HATE working out… but I LOVE the results.
- I HATE studying… but I LOVE the results.
You have probably heard the good old saying
“Nothing grows in a comfort zone”
Michael Jordan once said:
“I have missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the winning shot…and missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life, and that is why…I succeed.”
We (humans) have a tendency to avoid pain and that is also why most of us never get good at anything.
We settle… Living a mediocre life…
I believe you don´t want that.
You have to go through something painful in order to get something pleasurable.
So… Focus on what you want… Think about what you have to go through to in order to get there… Then just be tough enough to go through it.
We all start out soft, that is ok, that is normal… but you got to get good at enduring pain, suffering and agony.
Once you get good at that there is nothing you cannot accomplish.
The ONLY thing that keeps you from accomplishing ANYTHING is really to go through the pain that is required to get there…
Any BIG goal you have, any goal that is worth having is going to be difficult to reach.
But listen: You should be happy that it is difficult to get there… because most people are SOFT, and most are NOT willing to go through what is necessary to get there. So once you DO accomplish it, it will be special because most people can´t do it.
Be happy it is difficult!
Because if it was easy it would not be special, and anyone could do it.
So, if you pick something that is difficult, that is a good thing, that means you picked something that is worth doing.
You didn´t pick something that was “bullshit” that anybody can do.
Most people are SOFT (weak) so they don´t pick big goals, or they are not serious, they say they want to be fit and in good shape, they say they want to make a lot of money, they say they want to start a business… but all of that is difficult… It is CRAZY difficult.
So… they make excuses…
“oooh I don´t have time, my job, I got school, my family, and bla bla bla bla bla…
Who gives a f##k!?
NOBODY cares about your bullshit excuses… People ONLY cares about your results.
They don´t care about what you had to go through to get there they ONLY care if you got it.
That´s how it works on planet earth.
- Get good at enduring pain
- Get good at suffering
- Get good at doing things that people don´t want to do
If you want to be successful you NEED that.
One of my favorite authors is Brian Tracy. He once said:
Successful people do what they are supposed to do whether they feel like it or not
That is discipline, that is toughness.
Click here to see some people I have helped understand!
Hope you found this blog post on how to get benefits from suffering to be helpful. If you have any questions about this then I will be more than happy to answer them in the comment section below!
I wish you much success! (even if you wish me the opposite)
Founder of: $tart Make $top Waste
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Well what can I say, you don’t mince words…. I like that! Straight to the point. I agree with you, if something is worth doing it’s not going to be easy. But the feeling of achievement you get when you successfully accomplish something is hard to beat and in the end…..definitely worth the pain.
Hehe glad you like it, not everyone does 😉
/All the best
You are so right John. The hardest lesson I have learnt in life is that the only person you have total control over is you, not your kids, spouse even the dog…..you are the only one. The second most profound lesson is that life isn’t fair so get one with it.
It is interesting that under the generation classification theory, the current generation is called Generation Snowflake where they are easily offended and need safe spaces where they are protected from the world. Simon Sinek posted a YouTube interview about how we takcle challenges and handle failure which is worth a watch.
Thanks for calling it as it is.
First of all, thank you for your comment, appreciate that a lot!
Will give the video a watch, thanks again!
/All the best
Wow, this is a great site with great content, I have never found anyone else being so direct and speak directly to face people with real facts, it’s very true for great results required you need to put more effort in them that’s the hard true that we people don’t want to hear. I appreciate your great words and I totally agree that many of us people are very soft, we don’t like struggling instead we only put some excuses.
On my opinion I would like to encourage you to keep working hard on your site for this information need to get as many people as possible, it’s of great help.
Thank you brother! Really appreciate your nice words, it inspires me to do like you say and continue to push out this kind of stuff!
/All the best
The Bitter truth of life is just been spilled in this article, I agree that not all of our distress and agony in life are meant to break us, some of it are trainings and test we must pass for our eventual success in life. It is tough to experience this hard times but just as the saying goes ” Tough times don’t last but tough people do. We must keep pushing and moving on, Thats the only way to grow
/Thank you for your comment
Hey there John,
what a great article, I’ve found it to be truly inspiring as well as informative & helpful. As far as the actual topic of the article itself goes, well all I can say is that the only barricades that a person meets & struggles with during his (or her) life, are the only ones which the person created himself. We can take absolutely everything in our hands- under the control and only we, ourselves can make changes to our life, battle our demons, overcome challenging steps in life and achieve our goals! While it is insanely hard to achieve this kind of state of mind, always remember guys & girls, that the most difficult roads in life lead to the most satisfying & fulfilling results! Thanks for the article and keep up the great work 😉
Thank you a lot of your comment, really appreciate the support!
Stress is actually what defines us, though not everyone wants to engage with stress but all wants to be successful and have a wonderful output. You said it all, Life doesn’t give a good result if don’t push hard and make lot’s of sacrifices.
This is a great post that motivates and gives hope, I really enjoyed it.
Great to hear that you found it inspiring! That was the main purpose of this, and also hopefully to wake persons up a bit.
There’s truth to the old saying “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger” – professional sports starts put in the hard yards and years of hard work to reach peak performance, just like a professional guitarist has calloused hand from constant practice. Hard work, suffering, pain all create one thing – strength. Great article!!
You got this!
There’s truth to the saying “What doesn’t kill you makes you stronger”, along with “No pain, no gain”. In the same way a professional sports start has put in years of hard yards and painful training to reach their peak level, and a professional guitarist has calloused hands from hours and hours of practice, if it’s easy, then it’s probably not worth doing. If it’s worth doing, then it’s also worth doing right – thanks for this insightful article!
Thanks John, this is a great post. You are very right, we should not make excuses, we should make it happen. When we are faced with situations where the choices are to fly or fight, we should learn to fight and win! The pain, the suffering and the agony should make us tough not make us soft! Yes we can!!!
Thank you for your comment!
/All the best
Even gold had to pass through fire. Beneath every bad thing is better one and after rain comes sunshine.
We need to take responsibility for our actions or inactions and learn from our mistakes. There is always light at the end of the tunnel.
Disney , Bill Gates , Buffets and other successful individuals in world have pathetic stories to tell. They were at one time of their lives labelled failures. So one has to be prepared to cross hurdles and obstacles in life before getting to the finishing line.
Thank you! What you say is on point!
Everyone starts out as a “failure” and that is that!
Thanks again for your comment!
/All the best
I must say that I am glad that I stumbled upon this article. All that you talk about is is so direct but true. We are very soft and we want everything on plate without doing a thing. Life is hard and we must fight if we want to succeed. You give me more motivation to continue with my work, thanks man.
That is exactly the reaction I am after!
Go and get yours!
Stratos K says
What an inspirational article. You are right to the point when you say that we try to avoid pain and settle with mediocre results. It’s in our nature that’s why most people come and go unnoticed and very few become really successful. You don’t hold back the way you describe everything and I like that. Maybe it is a bit over the top attitude but if it works for you then good for you. I like how a very sad event changed your perception of life and I totally feel you as something similar had happened to me also many years ago. I just hope your article will help more people to change their thinking and take their lives into their own hands.
Thank you! Appreciate your honesty and yes it might be a bit “over the top attitude” but the point is that I am angry, this makes me angry nowadays lol! You know, I have told so many people this over and over again, I mean people around me in the “off line” world and they claim that they listen… but still… I see what they are doing… and it breaks my heart at first… but then I become angry… then I calm down… and (most times) I just “break up” with that friend… As I am VERY serious about this stuff… Also, I want it to make an impact.
Hope that explains the “over the top attitude” a bit 😉
Thank you again for your comment and feedback!
Tim Bennett says
It’s not very often that I find someone who shares a similar opinion to me…
People are to soft. I am sick to death of everyone being offended by what someone says.
Well I am offended by them being offended!
I live by 3 rules…
1) No excuses…
2) No opinions…
3) No victims…
It came about after I also had a death in my life.
My best friend and business partner was murdered and I slowly sank into a bottle for about 3 months and then one day I realized that all he ever wanted for me was my success and I owed it to him to create success…
I sobered up and created success!
I found your story of your father very touching and although you are a hard spoken direct approach kinda guy, there is also a very loving and gentle part to you.
Thank you for sharing your story and I wish you every success.
Great job john!
Thank you Tim, you need to know that you touched my heart now with your words also, am so sorry to hear about your loss… but in the same time happy for the outcome… You know what I mean.
Love your mindset and am absolutely sure that you WILL reach any goal that you set for yourself.
Thank you again.
Tim Bennett says
I absolutely know what you mean.
I wish you massive success!
Thank you Tim,
wish you the same in everything,
if there ever is anything you can contact me whenever you want,